🌱 What Your Emotions Are Actually Trying to Say
💡 Sol Bites: 4 Steps to Sit With the Discomfort
🦉 Words of Wisdom
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What Your Emotions Are Actually Trying to Say
In a way, uncomfortable feelings are good for you. Why? Because they’re trying to tell you something.
For instance, you may find yourself putting off certain work-related tasks. In your head, you might think that means you’re lazy. But maybe it’s something else. Maybe part of you knows your job as a whole isn’t really your path. It was something that someone else wanted for you (like your parents, partner, or social circle), and your mind is rebelling, sending you a signal to change things up.
Anxiety works the same way. Your brain has an alarm system. It watches for danger and alerts you when something is wrong. But it’s not perfect. Sometimes it goes off over something minor, just like a smoke detector triggered by burning toast.
In your kitchen, you can reset the alarm, open a window, and move on like nothing happened. But when it comes to your brain, what you do after your anxiety alarm goes off changes how loud the internal alarm sounds next time.
Running from unpleasant feelings trains your brain to think,This thing is dangerous. If you keep avoiding the feeling, the alarm gets louder and the problem gets worse.
If you can stay with the feeling, though, your brain starts feeling comfortable with it and the alarm becomes less sensitive.
This same theory applies to procrastination. And if you never stop to ask yourself what it’s really signalling, you’ll never find out where your mind is trying to redirect you.
Sol Bites: 4 Steps to Sit With the Discomfort
So next time you want to procrastinate or you feel anxious, try this:
1) Notice the resistance. Don’t jump straight into an “I’m lazy” or "I'm so anxious” talk track. Just acknowledge your feelings first.
2) Next, ask why. “Is this task something I really want to do? Or is this something I’m doing because of other people?” Or maybe it’s, “Is this fear real? Or is it a false alarm?”
3) Stay in the feeling. Don’t avoid it. Don’t numb it. Sit with discomfort for a minute instead of navigating away from it.
4) Keep repeating this process. One time won’t fix anything. Your brain needs to see the pattern repeat before it believes the danger is gone.
Sometimes a boring task is just a boring task. Not every case of procrastination means your soul is rejecting your life choices. You still have to use judgment, but this simple process is worth attempting because it costs you nothing to try and costs a lot if you ignore.
Worst case, you sit with a feeling for a minute and it fades anyway. Best case, you catch the message your mind’s been sending and finally stop drowning it out.
Plus, the real research on how long a feeling lasts
Words of Wisdom
Emotions are data, they are not directives
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